The leaves are prematurely falling here in the north. Today is equi-lichtal--equal light (is that a word?). My dad always said that it rains around the equinox and sure enough there is plenty of rain in the air. I like fall, the growing sense of inward journey, of internalness and the beginning of nesting for cooler weather.
Nesting is a particularly happy thing for us introverts, who like navel-gazing in quiet times, writing in our journals, and being contemplative in a noisy way in front of TV. Is fall a gift for good introverts?
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Friday, July 31, 2009
Sabbath
It's cold where I have chosen to have some Sabbath time. The coldest July on record, with temperatures yesterday only in the upper 60's. I wear a jacket on the last day of July!
Sometimes Sabbath can be like this--something that is surprisingly different than normal, that jolts us out of the complacency of life and plonks us down in a new place. This Sabbath for me is beginning to be like this.
I have had a challenging spring and early summer. Conflict. Being called names like Liar. My head has swum with the vehemence of it, the utter unbelievability of how something I wanted to be so positive turned so bitter and accusatory of my very intentions. I intended good and it was perceived as evil. What surprising and hurtful results.
I have questioned myself, lost confidence in my skills, been hurt deeply.
Getting through all that to this coldest of July's is perhaps a perfect gauntlet to run through.
I ask prayers for those who hate me, for myself and my hurt, for their hurt.
I have gone fishing here and caught nothing. Catching nothing is the metaphor for God's calling me forward to my own humility and pain, to be real. God is with me, I feel it, calling me. I have answered one large call and must keep answering that call again and again--keep reasserting that I am responding YES to all that God is creating in me.
This Sabbath has not been easy. When I hear the word Sabbath, I imagine rest and low level activity. Yes there has been that, but also a rending of my heart, catching nothing, being here in the surprising cold, hoping for sunshine.
Sometimes Sabbath can be like this--something that is surprisingly different than normal, that jolts us out of the complacency of life and plonks us down in a new place. This Sabbath for me is beginning to be like this.
I have had a challenging spring and early summer. Conflict. Being called names like Liar. My head has swum with the vehemence of it, the utter unbelievability of how something I wanted to be so positive turned so bitter and accusatory of my very intentions. I intended good and it was perceived as evil. What surprising and hurtful results.
I have questioned myself, lost confidence in my skills, been hurt deeply.
Getting through all that to this coldest of July's is perhaps a perfect gauntlet to run through.
I ask prayers for those who hate me, for myself and my hurt, for their hurt.
I have gone fishing here and caught nothing. Catching nothing is the metaphor for God's calling me forward to my own humility and pain, to be real. God is with me, I feel it, calling me. I have answered one large call and must keep answering that call again and again--keep reasserting that I am responding YES to all that God is creating in me.
This Sabbath has not been easy. When I hear the word Sabbath, I imagine rest and low level activity. Yes there has been that, but also a rending of my heart, catching nothing, being here in the surprising cold, hoping for sunshine.
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Refiner of Silver
Malachi 3:3 says: 'He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver.'
This verse puzzled some women in a Bible study and they wondered what this statement meant about the character and nature of God. One of the women offered to find out the process of refining silver and get back to the group at their next Bible Study.
That week, the woman called a silversmith and made an appointment to watch him at work. She didn't mention anything about the reason for her interest beyond her curiosity about the process of refining Silver.
As she watched the silversmith, he held a piece of silver over the fire and let it heat up. He explained that in refining silver, one needed to hold the silver in the middle of the fire where the flames were hottest as to burn away all the impurities. The woman thought about God holding us in such a hot spot; then she thought again about the verse that says: 'He sits as a refiner and purifier of silver.'
She asked the silversmith if it was true that he had to sit there in front of the fire the whole time. The man answered that yes, he not only had to sit there holding the silver, but he had to keep his eyes on the silver the entire time it was in the fire. If the silver was left a moment too long in the flames, it would be destroyed. The woman was silent for a moment.. Then she asked the silversmith, 'How do you know when the silver is fully refined?' He smiled at her and answered, 'Oh, that's easy -- when I see my image in it.'
This was passed on to me via email from an attorney friend of mine, who got it from her sister. I usually don't engage with this kind of spam, but the story intrigued me and meant a lot to me and my own life and wanted to share it with you.
This verse puzzled some women in a Bible study and they wondered what this statement meant about the character and nature of God. One of the women offered to find out the process of refining silver and get back to the group at their next Bible Study.
That week, the woman called a silversmith and made an appointment to watch him at work. She didn't mention anything about the reason for her interest beyond her curiosity about the process of refining Silver.
As she watched the silversmith, he held a piece of silver over the fire and let it heat up. He explained that in refining silver, one needed to hold the silver in the middle of the fire where the flames were hottest as to burn away all the impurities. The woman thought about God holding us in such a hot spot; then she thought again about the verse that says: 'He sits as a refiner and purifier of silver.'
She asked the silversmith if it was true that he had to sit there in front of the fire the whole time. The man answered that yes, he not only had to sit there holding the silver, but he had to keep his eyes on the silver the entire time it was in the fire. If the silver was left a moment too long in the flames, it would be destroyed. The woman was silent for a moment.. Then she asked the silversmith, 'How do you know when the silver is fully refined?' He smiled at her and answered, 'Oh, that's easy -- when I see my image in it.'
This was passed on to me via email from an attorney friend of mine, who got it from her sister. I usually don't engage with this kind of spam, but the story intrigued me and meant a lot to me and my own life and wanted to share it with you.
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Faith
Thomas Merton says there are two types of faith. The faith that we bring to church to us, that looks over our shoulder to see if we are conforming to what is going on around us. The second type is the faith that lies deep within us, close to our hearts, and grounds our lives.
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Clearing the temple
I believe Christ is asking us all to enter into our grief and loss, whatever dark places are within us and come into a place of unconditional love, so that we can be healed.
When Jesus enters the temple to drive away the money changers and declares that the house of God will not be made a marketplace, he is doing something prophetic. He says he will tear the temple down and raise is again in three days. This is perhaps a scary aspect of the Christ that we want to think is all love.
Christ is telling the authorities that his body is the temple that will die and be raised in three days. To them this is unbelievable. To the disciples, who remembered these words of his, they then understood their meaning after his resurrection.
There may be parts of each of us that are crying out for resurrection. Parts that we have made a marketplace where we look for exchanges to take place, but not for a real relationship with our God. We see signs of resurrection around us—the green shoots beginning to show from the soil, the red wing black birds coming to make their nests, the sun staying with us a little longer each day. These signs give me hope, as does the gospel, that whatever Jesus is here to tear down within us will be built up with resurrecting life and light.
It is scary to enter into the places inside that Jesus wants to come and we are sometimes afraid to let him enter.
Jesus may challenge us to risk being vulnerable, to lose our composure; Jesus may challenge us to be real when we would rather be right, or at least to cover up our insecurities.
The Jesus who would tear down a temple and raise it in three days is one of action,
this is the Christ who destroys what is old and getting in the way of our faith
and also the Christ who is ready to give us life and give it abundantly.
Do we need to be destroyed in order to be given new life? I don’t think so. But sometimes we may need to give up control over some things, to let go, be able to lose something so that something more wonderful can be given to us by God. That is the cycle of death and resurrection—one of letting go of some things so that new things can be born in us.
This may be one of the most difficult things we humans have to let God do for us. The losses I have felt were able to be given to God in exchange for new life in Christ—new faith, new spiritual friendships that were right there waiting for me, giving me a sense of God’s presence with me and for me. I felt my own resurrection through the love around me.
Going through traumatic experiences is not a piece of cake. But we are never alone. God is giving us Christ, and Christ’s love through spiritual friends. Christ is asking us to trust that his love can enter our dark places and drive away our fear. We are being loved whether we know it or not, or can accept it or not. Christ is near at hand loving us. Christ is near at hand to help us, the love of Christ here to give us resurrection.
When Jesus enters the temple to drive away the money changers and declares that the house of God will not be made a marketplace, he is doing something prophetic. He says he will tear the temple down and raise is again in three days. This is perhaps a scary aspect of the Christ that we want to think is all love.
Christ is telling the authorities that his body is the temple that will die and be raised in three days. To them this is unbelievable. To the disciples, who remembered these words of his, they then understood their meaning after his resurrection.
There may be parts of each of us that are crying out for resurrection. Parts that we have made a marketplace where we look for exchanges to take place, but not for a real relationship with our God. We see signs of resurrection around us—the green shoots beginning to show from the soil, the red wing black birds coming to make their nests, the sun staying with us a little longer each day. These signs give me hope, as does the gospel, that whatever Jesus is here to tear down within us will be built up with resurrecting life and light.
It is scary to enter into the places inside that Jesus wants to come and we are sometimes afraid to let him enter.
Jesus may challenge us to risk being vulnerable, to lose our composure; Jesus may challenge us to be real when we would rather be right, or at least to cover up our insecurities.
The Jesus who would tear down a temple and raise it in three days is one of action,
this is the Christ who destroys what is old and getting in the way of our faith
and also the Christ who is ready to give us life and give it abundantly.
Do we need to be destroyed in order to be given new life? I don’t think so. But sometimes we may need to give up control over some things, to let go, be able to lose something so that something more wonderful can be given to us by God. That is the cycle of death and resurrection—one of letting go of some things so that new things can be born in us.
This may be one of the most difficult things we humans have to let God do for us. The losses I have felt were able to be given to God in exchange for new life in Christ—new faith, new spiritual friendships that were right there waiting for me, giving me a sense of God’s presence with me and for me. I felt my own resurrection through the love around me.
Going through traumatic experiences is not a piece of cake. But we are never alone. God is giving us Christ, and Christ’s love through spiritual friends. Christ is asking us to trust that his love can enter our dark places and drive away our fear. We are being loved whether we know it or not, or can accept it or not. Christ is near at hand loving us. Christ is near at hand to help us, the love of Christ here to give us resurrection.
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